{Music Musings} Songs that Auto-Complete

    What an age we live in. The answers to your questions can be found with the tip of your fingertips and a handy connection to Google. From the stupidly simple to the obscenely obscure. Heck, even the irrelevant, absurd, and unanswerable bring answers. Well, uh... results at least.
    Don't have any questions? No problem, the Googster's got you covered! What you say? How so? Well, thanks to a little feature you know as Auto-Complete, your 5 W's make you more probing than an alien reporter. Now, I'm fairly certain it's the most popular searches that have enough street cred to get on the list, so by using this method you can find the most important questions in the average internet user's life! Type in "Why" and inquiries like "why do cats purr" and "why is the sky blue" pop up. Less wholesome matters also make the list, such as "why is my poop green" and "why did I get married too." Some seemingly off-the-wall questions appear too, though usually for some reason (the first match is "why can't I own a Canadian," which apparently is a parody letter relating to some Biblical law). After a bit of quick tinkering, I've a few odd favorites:

• "Why t" yields "Why the f do you have a kid," which is a blog similar to FailBlog, only documenting bad parenting instead of... fail.
• "How i" lists "How is babby formed," a meme of some sort.
• "What o" oddly gives "What organs are protected by the pelvic girdle," which must be a pressing question indeed.
• "What l" shockingly includes "What level does Magikarp evolve." I mean, c'mon. Everyone knows it's level 20!
• Finally, "Who th" tosses up "Who threw that ham at me," which seems to be a comedy song about a guy trying to steal clunky food items and getting caught.

    Turns out there's a whole blog dedicated to these autocompletetrocities. (That means I can stop trying to find ones myself here :P )

    But let's bring this home and apply it to music, shall we? What types of songs are the general public searching for? Should be easy enough! "Songs that..."
    Wellwellwell, clearly enough it's the sentimental sort that flock to the search-bar. Tunes that hit an emotion seem most prominent. Happiness, sadness, ups and downs. Bumping. And pumping. Of course, it wouldn't be the internet without that touch of annoyance. What songs can I use to irritate people the most, hmmm... ones that get stuck in the head! I'm actually surprised to see that story-telling slot though. Songs that lift us through some journey or adventure, if done effectively, can produce the most magic, due to the restrictions a structure (i.e. rhyme scheme) and time limit create. Good to see the masses are pursuing those kinds of melodies.
    Perhaps one day I'll look at what these searches produce and see what top hits the Goog gives us. See what it thinks the sad or happy songs are... More importantly, finally use that "I'm Feeling Lucky" button for something other than a hit-or-miss lottery. There's also much variation that can be done here; I'd rather not list ALL of them here. By adding a letter after the "songs that," a grand-spanking NEW list falls. I'll leave you with some, but go ahead and try it out yourself! Mayhap you'll find good hits under "Songs that work best when falling out of the sky!" (if only...)

• "Songs that q(uestion the meaning of life)". Without looking at the results, the Theme to Monty Python's The Meaning of Life comes to mind.
• "Songs that r(epresent me)" since Google knows you very well.
• "Songs that w(ill get you laid)". Man, I must be listening to the wrong kind of music!
• "Songs that y(ou must have on your iPod)" even if you don't have one.
• "Songs that o(bjectify women/men)". Both are listed- how's that for equality?
• "Songs that n(obody knows)" yet everybody searches for.
• "Songs that wo(n the war)". Too bad the songs that lost are forgotten in history.
• "Songs that I( can write)" because plagiarism is a lie!
• "Songs that r(elate to {insert any required reading from high school})". Seriously, any book you've read in high school can be substituted.
• "Songs that y(ou can listen to)" instead of just stare at.
• "Songs that r(hyme)". They're a very hard type to find.
• "Songs that mu(st be played at max volume)" or ELSE! ... ..!
• "Songs that t(ickle your funny bone)". Who says "tickle your funny bone" anymore?
• "Songs that g(o hard)". All you gotta do is TURN ON your music player. Anybody?

    Alright, that's enough. Have fun!